Behind the Scenes!

In November, I spent my first time as a PA on set. For those who don’t know what that position is, he’s basically coffee-and-odd-errands boy. Any set can technically get by without a PA, but having one or more can make things move faster and more smoothly.

I ran out to get actors’ coffee. I played the lead’s hands in a few close-ups. I ran all the way to Staples, then OfficeMax, then a random print shop just to find the right kind of printer cartridge. I ran food and coffee upstairs to the crew every five minutes for ten hours. I carried metal chairs and tables, c-stands, sandbags, extension cords, and other pieces of heavy equipment from a truck two blocks away until it was empty, then I filled it again at the end of each night. I had no idea what I was doing, and yet I did just about everything I was qualified to do on that set, except act in the film itself.

So why would an actor seek out a position behind the camera?

You need to learn to respect every position on set. Every position. That, and now a producer out there knows how reliable and hardworking I am, which is a great thing to know about an actor when you cast them. Who knows, maybe she’ll cast me in an Oscar-winning role someday. Or maybe she’ll never give me an opportunity to act in a project. Either way, I’m still proud of how far I went to make sure the little things got done before they even crossed her mind. I can’t thank her enough, and I’d happily PA again for her anytime, whether it ever leads to acting or not.

It’s good to feel proud of yourself for something else once in a while. :)



Last year, right around October, a lot of new things started happening for me. A perspective that I had been keeping for a long time started to crack and crumble, I learned new marketing methods for how to get in touch with people I want to work with, and on top of that, I started receiving payment for my acting occasionally. These changes have all come at once, and a lot of this past month has been spent trying to adjust to them.

For instance, I recently got my letter confirming my SAG Eligibility. Which is great news! It is!

But with it, there can be so many more questions and decisions! When do I join, what do I do until then, what do I do afterwards, do I need representation first, does this SAG card make my butt look big? It’s comically overwhelming most of the time, and although I’ve made most of those decisions and answered most of those questions, everyone still has an opinion on the matter. It’s not easy to stick to what feels right for you when everyone else has so much to say on the subject. But, for the meantime, I’m maintaining my “eligible” status until it becomes a hinderance.

Right now things are a bit hectic too. Specifically because, well, I’m in a hotel room in Salt Lake City. I’m on my way to Grand Junction, Colorado for the premiere of One Step Behind, the short film that helped me earn my eligibility back in October! I’ve never been to a festival before, and I’m not sure what to expect right now. I’m more curious than nervous, so it’s going to be fun! :)

Things have been changing though, that’s for sure. 21 is a good age for figuring out who you are, but all I know for certain is that I’m not the same. And I can’t go back, not happily.

It’s time to head out, so I kind of want to end on a quote that’s very dear to me, one that I get reminded of each year at this time.

“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”